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Apollo 18

by Hudson L.

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1.
Dig My Grave 00:55
Dig my grave Dig my grave Every time I look in your eyes I see St. Peter wave Dig my grave Dig my grave Every time you call my name I hear the angels say Dig my grave Dig my grave Dig my grave Dig my grave Dig my grave
2.
Someday Mother will die and I'll get the money Mom leans down and says, "My sentiments exactly, you son of a bitch" I palindrome I I palindrome I I palindrome I I palindrome I And I am a snake head eating the head on the head on the opposite side I palindrome I Man o nam I palindrome I Man o nam See that bulletproof dress hanging from the clothesline See the medical chart with the random zig-zag Now I'll help it decide Son, I am able, she said Though you scare me. Watch Said I. Beloved, I said Watch me scare you, though Said she, Able am I, Son See the spring of the grandfather clock unwinding See the hands of my offspring making windmills Dad palindrome Dad I palindrome I
3.
Words fail Buildings tumble The ground opens wide Light beams down from heaven She stands before my eyes She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror But they're actual size As she drives away Big men Often tremble As they step aside I thought I was big once She changed my mind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me I've never known anybody like her She's actual size Nationwide, believe She's got All the money Money couldn't buy She's got something special That someone left behind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror But they're actual size Actual size to her Her face Hangs in portrait On the post office wall She's stuck in my heart now Where my blood belongs She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me I've never known anybody like her She's actual size Actual size, believe
4.
My Evil Twin 03:33
My evil twin Bad weather friend He always wants to start when I want to begin It scares me so Like I scare myself With that book of Nostradamus Up upon my shelf Playing hangman till the morning light Doing donuts on the neighbor's lawn Then sleep all through the day Get up and start again I can hear some sirens somewhere But I don't know why My evil twin Runs home again Search lights look for an alibi, but I'll be home by then Here he comes again My evil twin My friends have seen him hiding Underneath my skin Who cut the arm off the voodoo doll That resembles a Republican president from long ago I'd hate to see you leave 'Cause I have grown so grateful for the Blame you save me from My twin My twin My twin I know he looks like me Hates work like me and walks like me He's even got a twin like me My evil twin Bad weather friend I know some day I'll meet him But I don't know where or when
5.
Mammal 02:05
Glass of milk Standing in between extinction in the cold And explosive radiating growth So the warm blood flows Through the large four-chambered heart Maintaining the very high metabolism rate they have Mammal, mammal Their names are called They raise a paw The bat, the cat Dolphin and dog Koala bear and hog One of us might lose his hair But you're reminded that it once was there From the embryonic whale to the monkey with no tail So the warm blood flows With the red blood cells lacking nuclei Through the large four-chambered heart Maintaining the very high metabolism rate they have Placental the sister of her brother Marsupial Their cousin called Monotreme Dead uncle Allotheria Mammal, mammal Their names are called They raise a paw The bat, the cat Dolphin and dog Koala bear and hog The fox, the ox Giraffe and shrew Echidna, caribou
6.
The statue got me high The statue got me high The monument of granite sent a beam into my eye The statue made me die The statue made me die It took my hand, it killed me, and it turned me to the sky The stone, it called to me And now I see the things the stone has shown to me A rock that spoke a word An animated mineral, it can be heard And though I once preferred a human being's company They pale before the monolith that towers over me The statue got me high The statue got me high The truth is where the sculptor's chisel chipped away the lie The statue made me fry The statue made me fry My coat contained a furnace where there used to be a guy And as the screaming fire engine siren filled the air The evidence had vanished from my charred and smoking chair And what they found was just a statue standing where the statue got me high And what they found was just a statue standing where the statue got me high And now it is your turn your turn to hear the stone and then your turn to burn The stone, it calls to you you can't refuse to do the things it tells you to And as the screaming fire engine siren fills the air The evidence will vanish from your charred and smoking chair And what they found was just a statue standing where the statue got me high And what they'll find is just a statue standing where the statue got you high
7.
8.
The Guitar 08:13
Hey Who's that playing Hey The guitar? Is it Jim? I don't know Is it Jim? I don't know In the spaceship, the silver spaceship the lion takes control In the spaceship, the silver spaceship the lion takes control Hey Who's that playing Hey The guitar? Hush my darling, be still my darling The lion's on the phone Hush my darling, be still my darling The lion's on the phone Hush my darling, be still my darling Hey Hush my darling, be still my darling Hey Turn it up The guitar I can't hear The guitar In the spaceship, the silver spaceship the lion waves goodbye In the spaceship, the silver spaceship the lion waves goodbye Hey Who's that playing Hey The guitar? Hey
9.
Dinner Bell 02:02
I've been leaving on my things So in the morning when the morning bird sings There's still dinner on my dinner Jacket till the dinner bell rings Experimental dog Salivating dog Good dog Waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ring I've been leaving on my things So in the morning when the morning bird sings There's still dinner on my dinner Jacket till the dinner bell rings I don't want a pizza, I don't want a piece of Peanut brittle, I don't want a pear I don't want a bagel, I don't want a bean I Wouldn't like a bag of beef or a beer or a Cup of chowder, corn, cake, or creamed cauliflower cause I'm Waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ring Shoulder, bicep, elbow, arm Forearm, thumb, wrist, knuckle, palm Middle, pinky, index, ring Dinner bell, dinner bell, ding I don't know whether I'd rather be having a bottle of vinegar I don't know whether I'd rather be having an egg I don't know whether I'd rather be having an order of bacon Or whether I'd rather be having a basket of garlic bread I don't know whether I'd rather be having some pie or Saving my appetite 'cause I'm Waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ring I've been leaving on my things So in the morning when the morning bird sings There's still dinner on my dinner Jacket till the dinner bell does the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, do the bell thing I'm waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ding ding ding Waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ding ding ding Waiting for the dinner bell to do the bell thing Dinner bell, dinner bell, ding
10.
I don't want to change your mind I don't want to think about your mind They say love is blind I don't think you're blind You don't want to understand I don't want to shake your father's hand And walk in the sand And act like a man I get on the bus Ride past our stop And though I'm late I can't get off I just can't bear to tell you some lies And narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes We'll take back every thing we said Split up all the things and move ahead Forgot how you said We'll split the side off the bed I get on my bike Ride down our block Ride through the world Through the green lights But when I think of all your advice I narrow my eyes Narrow my eyes I don't want to change your mind I don't want to think about your mind They say love is blind I don't think you're blind I get on the bus Ride past our stop And though I'm late I can't get off I just can't bear to tell you some lies And narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Now let's toast the sad cold fact Our love's never coming back And we'll race to the bottom of a glass I don't want to change your mind I don't want to think about your mind They say love is blind I don't think you're blind I get on the bus Ride past our stop And though I'm late I can't get off I just can't bear to tell you some lies And narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes Narrow your eyes
11.
Here in the hall of heads You look through the keyhole This is the hall of heads One step through the doorway Roll out that special head This is our favorite one Please don't try to leave Don't leave the hall of heads Hide underneath the porch Hide down behind the furnace You can't get away You can't really hide Once you hear the call The song of the hall of heads You can't run away Your feet won't help you run You can't run away Out of the hall of heads
12.
Which describes how you're feeling all the time Which describes how you're feeling all the Feeling all the time There's this guy in the sky and he makes you want to Want to make you sigh, like the time When you felt like you're feeling all the time And you sighed at the cracks in the ceiling all the time You said "I'm feeling fine" but it didn't really rhyme It didn't rhyme, overseas Which describes how you're feeling all the time It describes how you're feeling Which describes how you're feeling all the time When you lie that your life's unappealing all the time But your lie doesn't rhyme with the word overseas Overseas there's this guy Who describes how you're feeling all the time In his mind he can find how you're feeling all the time From behind distant lines Even straighter than his spine Which is fine Which is fine And describes how you're feeling all the time
13.
I lay my head On the railroad track Stare at the sky All painted up Your train is gone, won't be coming back See the constellation ride across the sky No cigar, no lady on his arm Just a guy made of dots and lines Just a guy made of dots and lines Two years ago Moved from my town I was looking up Past the city lights But the city lights got in my way See the constellation ride across the sky No cigar, no lady on his arm Just a guy made of dots and lines Just a guy made of dots and lines I found my mind On the ground below I was looking down It was looking back I was in the sky, all dressed in black See the constellation ride across the sky No cigar, no lady on his arm Just a guy made of dots and lines Just a guy made of dots and lines Just a guy made of dots and lines Just a guy made of dots and lines Can you hear what I see in the sky? Can you hear what I see in the sky? Can you hear what I see in the sky? Can you hear what I see in the sky? Can you hear what I see in the sky? Can you hear what I see in the sky?
14.
If I wasn't shy If I wasn't shy I'd burn all the uniforms I'd burn all the "Ask Me" buttons I'd burn all the intercoms I'd burn all the time clock cards If I wasn't shy If I wasn't shy I'd steal somebody's Cadillac I'd steal anything I lack I'd steal all the microphones From all the masters of ceremony If I wasn't shy I'd ask you, if you don't mind To kiss you a hundred times If I wasn't shy If I wasn't shy
15.
Turn Around 03:05
I was working all night in my office When a man I had recently killed Called me up from a phone near my building So I looked out the window at him He had the same obsequious manner That was the reason I had him killed So to calm my nerves I sang this song To him, over the phone Turn around, turn around There's a thing there that can be found Turn around, turn around It's a human skull on the ground Human skull on the ground Turn around I was out by myself in the graveyard I was doing an interpretive dance When I felt something heavy and pointed Strike me in the back of my neck And then the ghost of my dance instructor Pushed me down into an open grave And as dirt rained down she played a xylophone And sang me this song Turn around, turn around There's a thing there that can be found Turn around, turn around It's a human skull on the ground Human skull on the ground Turn around We were waving our arms out the window Of a fast moving passenger train Acting in an irresponsible fashion Until the engineer whose back had been turned And who we thought would find us highly amusing Quickly swiveled his head around And his face which was a paper-white mask of evil Sang us this song Turn around, turn around There's a thing there that can be found Turn around, turn around It's a human skull on the ground Human skull on the ground Turn around Turn around, turn around There's a thing there that can be found Turn around, turn around It's a human skull on the ground Human skull on the ground Turn around
16.
He's a hypnotist, hypnotist of ladies He's a hypnotist, hypnotist of ladies You're getting sleepy, very sleepy He's a hypnotist, hypnotist of ladies Never had a pocket watch, never counted backwards You won't remember why you liked him You won't remember why you liked him
17.
Everything is catching, yes Everything is catching on fire
18.
Fingertips 00:08
Fingertips Fingertips Fingertips
19.
I hear the wind blow I hear the wind blow It seems to say "Hello, hello I'm the one who loves you so."
20.
Hey now everybody, now Hey now everybody Hey now everybody, now
21.
Who's that standing Out the window?
22.
I found a new friend underneath my pillow
23.
Come on and wreck my car
24.
Aren't you the guy who hit me in the eye? Aren't you the guy who hit me in the eye?
25.
Please pass the milk, please Please pass the milk, please Please pass the milk, please
26.
Leave me alone Leave me alone
27.
Who's knocking on the wall?
28.
All Alone 00:08
All alone, all alone All by myself
29.
What's that blue thing doing here?
30.
Something grabbed a hold of my hand I didn't know what had my hand But that's when all my troubles began
31.
I don't understand you I just don't understand you I don't understand the things you say I can't understand a single word
32.
I heard a sound I turned around Turned around to find the thing that made the sound
33.
Mysterious whisper Mysterious whisper Mysterious whisper Mysterious whisper
34.
The day that love came to play
35.
I'm having a heart attack I'm having a heart attack
36.
Fingertips Fingertips
37.
And I walk along darkened corridors
38.
Space Suit 03:50

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As a Christmas gift, here is a full cover of Apollo 18 by They Might Be Giants.

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released December 26, 2023

all songs written by John Linnell and John Flansburgh.

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Hudson L. Alberta

Musician who makes weird crap.

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